Auburn police responded to the following calls for service, among many others, between Jan. 16 and Jan. 23:

Jan. 16

Burglary: 6:02 a.m., 1344 17th St. SE. A witness called 911 to report that he had seen two men inside a secured, fenced car lot, removing tires from the lot by throwing them over the fence to a neighboring apartment complex. Police contacted the two tire filchers and arrested them.

Vandalism: 7:19 p.m., 400 block of 37th Street Southeast. A woman called 911 to complain that a pole had “gone through her house.” She told dispatch that the pole was about six feet long, and that she had no idea when or how the perforation of her domicile happened. Turns out that a neighbor’s friend builds garage-door-opening systems, and he might have backed into the victim’s house.

Jan. 17

Assault on police officer: 6:34 p.m., 1902 A St. SE. Police arrested a teenage girl for third-degree assault after she launched her fists at a police officer. The officer blocked the punch and wasn’t hurt. Police also arrested a man for obstruction of a law enforcement officer and resisting arrest.

Shoplifting: 7:25 p.m., 801 Auburn Way N. A loss prevention employee at Fred Meyer reported that he or she had caught a 17-year-old boy trying to leave the store with a car battery without bothering himself with that bit about paying.

Trespassing: 8:19 p.m., 12932 SE. 288th Place. Three unknown suspects trespassing at an abandoned house used the fireplace to roast smores. The sweet-toothed suspects left before police could get there.

Jan. 19

Shoplifting: 3:48 p.m., 101 Auburn Way S. Police arrested a woman for stealing soap, glasses and other items from Safeway. Police did not disclose a value for the pilfered items.

Shoplifting: 8:13 p.m., 101 Auburn Way S. Police arrested a man for shoplifting at Safeway. The man’s excuse was that he was unemployed, and did not have money to pay for the stolen items. Police issued the man a citation and sent him on his way.

Jan. 20

Theft: 1:05 a.m., 800 block of Pike Street Northeast. Thieves unknown stole tools from a vehicle. Police did not disclose a value for the missing tools.

Jan. 21

Theft: 6:54 a.m., 13000 block of Southeast 305th Place. Somebody stole a generator from a home. Police did not disclose a value for the missing generator.

Shoplifting: 10:08 a.m., 762 Supermall Drive SW. Police arrested a woman for shoplifting clothing from Walmart, despite having more than $500 cash in her purse.

Vandalism: 5:15 p.m., 500 block of 27th Street Southeast. During his 5-year-old son’s birthday party, a man decided to get angry with his wife concerning her checking of his cell phone usage. The unhappy male half-punched the wall three times to express the ferocity of his outrage. His wife refused to help police.

Jan. 23

Burglary: 5:50 a.m., 700 M St. NE. Burglars broke into a building under remodel over the weekend, stealing several tools and four spools of medical grade wiring. Police recovered a cell phone apparently belonging to the suspects and found several latent fingerprints.

Burglary: Overnight, 1825 K St. SE. Over the weekend, unknown persons burglarized Olympic Middle School, swiping a laptop computer and the contents of a vending machine in the teachers’ lounge area.

Burglary: 8:21 a.m., 800 4th St. NE. Burglars hit the Auburn Performing Arts Center at Auburn High School during the recent snowstorm, breaking into a vending machine and absconding with tasty snack foods.

Burglary: 12:34 a.m., 2300 block of M Street SE. Burglars hit Pioneer Elementary School during the snowstorm, taking six laptop computers of undisclosed value.

Theft: 12:27 p.m., 1825 K St. SE. Thieves stole three projectors from Olympic Middle School of undisclosed value.